Ashley and I had only been married two days before we had our first big argument. We drove all day from Mobile, Alabama, to Gatlinburg, Tennessee, and we were, to put it mildly, wiped out. Weddings are exhausting! Before the days of mobile phones with their ingenious GPS apps, we used those ancient documents called
maps. Ashley was looking at the map and was trying to figure out which road to take. We were approaching a fork in the road, and I asked her which way we should go. She said she was not sure, and well, Mr. Impatient got angry and said something stupid. I don't recall what I said, but it wasn't kind. Ashley did not appreciate it, and she let me know it. It was a quiet rest of the ride to our hotel and, well, let's just say we slept on opposite sides of the bed that night!
If you are married, you can tell a similar story. Marriage brings out the best and the worst in all of us. But I am happy to say that we apologized to each other and enjoyed the rest of our honeymoon. Want to hear something really cool? Ashley and I do not argue anymore. You may think that I am not telling the truth. We have disagreements, of course, but before those escalate into full blown arguments where things are said that should not be said, we talk it through calmly and work it out. I have learned how good it is for our marriage to say, "Yes, Dear." And Ashley has learned it is best to just let some things go, not get upset, and show me grace.
How do you work through your disagreements? Do you shout at each other, give each other the silent treatment, ignore each other, or worse? If you are having a hard time working through disagreements, let me encourage you to reach out to a biblical counselor and let him or her help you. Marriage counseling is a gift from God that you should take advantage of. There is no shame in admitting you need a little help. I know some wonderful marriages where they go to counseling because it is so valuable to them in helping them be the best they can be for each other. I think that is cool!
Husbands, we are commanded to love our wives like Jesus loved the Church. How did He do that? The most obvious way was, He laid down His life for us. That is the epitome of agape love. I have yet to meet a wife who would not gladly follow a husband who loved her so much that he put her needs before his own. Wives, our biblical verse for today's devotion instructs you to respect your husband. To respect him and show him honor and appreciation is so vital if you are to have a happy and blessed marriage. I know without a doubt that Ashley respects me, and that gives me so much peace and confidence that I think I can do just about anything. (Of course, I can't but don't tell me!) Seriously, love and respect are the golden keys, the secret sauce to blessed marriages.
How well are you showing love and respect to your spouse? Can I recommend a great resource that will help you tremendously, if you have not read it already? It is Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs' excellent book entitled,
Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs.
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