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"The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him."
(Psalm 28:7)
I have worked at this English Camp six different times now, starting in 2018. Over the years, I have filled many different roles ranging from English Teacher to seminar leader to American s'mores expert. (I may have made up that last title.) One of my favorite roles is that of small group leader because that is really where you get to go deeper with the teens to talk about the Lord. The only problem is, these conversations usually are in German.
It is no secret to anyone that the German language is extremely difficult to learn. I finished going to language school over a year ago, but I still struggle with deeper conversations in German. I am especially still learning and working on "Christian words". They just don't teach you words like "sanctification", "crucifixion", or "revelation" at language school! I've just been slowly learning these while going to church and Bible study. What has been really helpful is the side-by-side German/English Bible that three of my closest friends in Texas gifted me earlier this year. So I'm getting better every day, but it's still a work in progress.
Though the small group times typically take place in German, they have needed me to step in to help lead small groups in the past. However, my German was never good enough, so they gave me the older girls who spoke the best English, and we just did the group in English. I always loved serving in this way, but I also felt bad, knowing that they could express themselves and connect easier in their native language. The last time I was at English camp, I set a goal to be able to lead a small group in German by the next time I was there. I went in this year severely doubting if I could do it and just planned to do it in English again, or maybe 50/50. But then, on the first night, I realized that one of our girls really didn't speak much English at all. I was nervous, and I asked the Lord for help. I knew the Lord loved these girls more than I ever could, and I asked Him to help me lead the group in a way that would help them to know and follow Jesus more with their lives. It wasn't perfect, but we did it all in German! The other girls who spoke more English were sweet to fill in the random words I didn't know, but I really feel that the Lord led the conversations. I wasn't sure I could do it, but the Lord was faithful, and He helped me.
When you put yourself in a box, you are also putting God in a box, saying that He can only use you in certain ways. I can't tell you the number of times I've told myself and others that I'm just not good at language learning. It comes so easily to some, but to me, it is a painfully slow and frustrating process. And it might very well be true that I'm not great at language learning, but what if God wants to use me to reach German teens in their mother tongue? What if He actually wants to use me in an area I don't feel naturally gifted in for the very purpose of displaying His strength? What if God wants to use you in the specific area that you don't feel you are any good at just so He can display how strong He is in your weakness? Are you willing to let Him? You will miss out on such blessings if you never open yourself up to being used by God in new ways. You don't have to be strong or gifted for every task He lays before you; you just need to be obedient and prayerful.
Remember Psalm 28:7. The Lord is your strength. He will help you.
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